Tuesday, November 22, 2011

I need a cute duffel bag

My heart hurts. How can it hurt when it's dead?   Hope.

The love I receive on a daily basis from all of your true and kind souls gives me hope. Hope is all we need right? A little hope will grow into more hope.

I will scrounge around and look for it, collect the small pieces.  Soon I will have a batch.  Enough batches and I will make a rainbow of happiness ... and share it with you.


Where is my duffel bag?


  1. Oh Anna I'm so glad to see you are feeling a bit better and that all of our messages gave you some warmth in this hard time you are going through :)

    Keep on fighting and if you you need a duffel bag I'd be more than happy to send you one :)

    This might not be the right moment, but I wanted to pass on to you my first award here on blogger because I really love your blog that is so unique, funny and honest. I hope I'm not being clumsy here but I really wanted to share it with you :) It's the Versatile Blogger Award. If ever you are interested, you can check out the info on my latest post.

    Once again, I hope I'm not being clumsy here, but you have by far one the best blogs I've ever seen because you are so authentic, funny and kind.

    Chocolate kisses from Geneva,

    Love Emilie

  2. A while ago you gave my thumb a hug on youtube cause it was cracked. My thumb said you can have it back cause your crack is bigger. :P

    I remember a time when the things I wrote sounded a lot like yours. I have a whole notebook full of em (no blogs then, im old) Anyway that bastard is long gone (not to mention a few other bastards since that first OG bastard) But I am still here. I am still me, I am still pretty fucking awesome.

    You are still pretty fucking awesome too, just might not feel like it right now. Keep your heart up, your head up and your fists up cause you are strong girl!

  3. Ahh hope, it's such an awesome thing! I really hope things start turning around for you!

    And hey, if you find a duffle bag with unicorns on it, let me know!! lol

  4. My heart hurts for you. I will keep you in my prayers. I wish I knew you better so that I could go over and make you soup or eat junk food and cry together. Take your time to wallow and then let it go. Be strong my dear friend.

  5. Oh, honey! I don't know what's hurting your heart but I hate it! I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers, and you know where to find me if you ever need to talk. (Deep AND meaningless conversations!)

  6. Ana it breaks my heart seeing you sad :( i hope whatever it is your going through goes by quickly and you come back stronger than ever.. you have alot of ppl here that care for you !! i'll keep you in my prayers <3 <3<3

  7. Hope is everything.
    And if you need a duffel bag but don't have one, I have one that I can spare. Take care, my lovely.

  8. Oh loodie, I am.so sorry. I wish I could send you my Swatch watch duffel bag from junior high. It would be just the thing.

  9. Hope will get you through. Hang in there. And just in case, I just picked up a super cute duffel at Ross last week!

  10. I do hope that you start to feel better soon. Whatever has happened, only time will heal it. It kills me that I can't joke with you like everything is normal and ok-I did send you an email sending you good thoughts. Let me know if there is anything I can do-take out a contract that sort of thing?

  11. You make me laugh all the time that I read your blog. I'm so sad to hear you speak this way :( I hope you don't mind but I like to share a scripture with you Isaiah 41:10. Here is my ((((hugs))))to you :)

  12. I have been thinking about you!!! >>>>>>sending tons of postitive thoughts your way<<<<<<<< Sounds like whatever you are going through SUCKS. Just remember, although we are softies, crabs have tough outer shells- you are strong! Crab-power! ;) <3

  13. Anna my love, my geek, I know that everything's dark now. I won't tell you not to hurt because you need to. Know why? So that when that day comes that you're not hurting anymore, you will know. And overcome. And that day WILL come, I know it will. Venting is good, so don't deny yourself and just look at all this outpouring of love: THIS, is affirmation that it's not you that's the problem or the cause. All us folks can't be wrong, you know. Lastly, if you need any legs broken, all you have to do is ask.....xoxoxox

  14. Really, all you need is a clean pair of undies and a toothbrush! Go on a trip, get back to your happy place and come back felling stonger, better and SEXIER than ever before!!! I was thinking of you last night; told hubby that you were having problems and he hopes you pull through this too!! You will come out on top!!! LOVE you!!!

  15. I will tell you something creepy if it will make you smile.

    Want to hear it?


    My first thought upon reading this was "I will make you a beautiful duffel bag from my skin and it will be the most beautiful bag ever."
    I feel like that's a bit too creepy to be funny, but we're gonna roll with it, kay?
    You're in my thoughts and I love you girl! (You can tell because I don't just make skin duffel bags for any old person).

  16. We all really do understand because none of us get out of this world without being hurt. It happens and you will need time to process it all. But there is a time to mourn and then it will be time to move forward. You are generous, lovely, intelligent, and funny. You deserve happiness and it will be yours again.

    It is hard to believe it now but you will end up better for going through this. Do not spend any time on hate, it will not hurt others but in time it will hurt you. When someone hurts you it is either deliberate because they want to hurt you or it is "fallout" from something else. Anyone who wants to hurt you is not worthy and sometimes you just have to feel sorry for people who hurt you because they are too "whatever" to have handled their lives well.

    It amazes me that this impersonal internet makes so many people special to us. You are special and I pray that you will come out of this time into a much better and happier place.

    God bless you.

  17. I look forward to the day you share a rainbow with us again.

    We love you, and hope your heart stops hurting soon <3

  18. just always know u are not alone and there IS always hope. you are so right about hope being the key...and LOVE of coarse!! :) not too long ago my heart was beyond crushed- like i had never felt before. for a month and a half my days went like this: i went to work-barely functioning, came home and literally curled up in the fetal position and cried and prayed til it was time to do it all over again. there will be better days :) xoxo

  19. Hugs to you! Hope you will find a pretty sparkly np to brighten up your nails to help a little.

  20. feel better ♥
    I miss your amazing blog posts! x

  21. I want to share a little nugget with you. It has helped me through some shitty times.

    If you are served a bowl of your favourite ice cream every day (if you do not like ice cream or are lactose intolerant replace that with something you do like) you will stop appreciating it.

    One day someone will come around and stop your ice cream service and instead serve you a hot bowl of shit. After eating this horrible bowl of disaster you will be miserable. After eating it for days and days you will eventually become numb to it.

    One days someone will come back and serve you another bowl of ice cream. Maybe vanilla which you did not love before. You (read me) much prefer something full of bits of delciousness not just plain boring vanilla; however, after eating poop for a week this vanilla ice cream is amazing. Excitement! Joy! Deliciousness!

    If we do not have shit we do not have delicious ice cream. A fine smattering of both is required for appreciation. Sometimes only a waft of the poop or watching the poop on tv is enough for me to appreciate what I have. I only hope that the shit is not raining on you too hard these days <3

    I wish you numbness for the poop and hope for the vanilla. Nix that, I wish you Cherry Garcia.

    Sorry for my ramblings. It makes sense in my head!

  22. Take care, and don't give up on people OR hope. Life can be/is shitty on many occasions and sometimes you have to struggle to find the gems that make it worthwhile...so don't stop looking for the good stuff, OK? Start looking for a bigger duffel bag, I am sure you you will need it. *hug*

  23. I hope you had a lovely Thanksgiving spent with family and/or friends you love who love you. We miss you and we understand. We look forward to hearing from you soon.

  24. wishing you the best <3 i hope things get better soon *hugs*

  25. I follow a lot of blogs and I don't often notice when someone stops posting for a while. Your absence has been noticed. I hope you feel better soon x

  26. I just stumbled upon you today...my heart hurts for you, I feel the hurt. I am sorry for whatever happened and pray for you that it all works out.

  27. Dear Anna,
    we don't know each other, but after I've read what you wrote, I felt I have to tell you this: I'd been hurt by someone before and I lost the faith in me and in all the good things. But that made me look around - maybe If I hadn't been broken hearted I wouldn't even notice that special person around me? Someone who waited patiently for me... Maybe I wouldn't appreciate his love? But I looked around, I noticed someone I gave him a chance and every day I'm so gratefull for the hurt I experienced. Every time when I think I could've just end up with that horrible guy from the past, it creeps me to the bone:) We have to encounter bad and ugly things only to appreciate all the great things around us - one of the earlier posts mentioned that icecream bowl, that's so damn true:)
    Hug your cat, those animals are true happiness machines! Hear his/her purring it's awesome and it makes me smile every time:) Smell its fur, it always smells so freaking awesome, like fresh straw:) life is beautiful, full of beautiful things, we need that bowl of shit to avoid neglecting that what we have.

  28. Hi Anna

    You are one of life's rare gems, who is kind, thoughtful and very giving. What ever troubles you, simply know that "we" are with you no matter what.

    So very few of us are considered more beautiful on the inside, than we are on the outside and this is very hard to achieve, when a babe like you is so beautiful.

    So please do not change. We love you just the way you are!!!

  29. I am sending my thoughts and warm wishes you you right now. Take care, attempt to enjoy the little things and always know that you are loved


  30. Ella Vickers Sailcloth Collection (EVSC) is a selection of Recycled Sail Bags, Sailcloth totes, Sailing, Duffel Bags Tote bags, Seabags, Duffel, Beach totes.

  31. Thanks in favor of sharing bayupradana
    such a fastidious thought, paragraph is nice, thats why i have read it entirely The Gaming Club bears a license from the paperwork of Gibraltar, and claims to be one of a prefer few casinos that have a license from the Gibraltar government. A zealot of the Interactive Gaming Council (IGC), The Gaming Club follows all the guidelines laid beside by the organization, something that has gone a long habit in it visceral official as a good area to gamble online.

    Everything not quite The Gaming Club feels good; be it the promotions, the huge number of games, the fused banking options on offer, the protester security measures, or the fair and held responsible gaming practices the casino adopts.

    The Gaming Club motors along upon software developed by one of the giants of online gaming software develop Microgaming. The software it uses is open-minded and has a range of features designed to tally up your online gambling experience and create you want to arrive assist after every circular of gambling you realize here.

    Another hallmark of a good casino is the tone of its customer hold team, and The Gaming Club does not disappoint on this front.