Friday, August 5, 2011

Involuntary AB workout

Have you ever woken up in the morning and your ab's were sore, but you didn't remember why?

48 hours before ...

I was feeling super lazy one night, I mean to the point where I was starving hungry, but still had zero motivation.  Like the grown mature woman that I am I curled up in a ball in a small corner of my 500 sq. ft. apartment and started to whine.  The hubs finally noticed and came over to check what all the hub bub was about.  He picked up my my limp body and asked, "what's wrong with you"?  "I'm hungry, can you make me food?" I said in a slow slurred speech to of course emphasize my lifeless energy ridden body.

I guess I really must explain.  Part of my laziness was from the fact that I had no idea (or food for that matter) about what to make for dinner.  Earlier in the evening I even asked for advice in the matter.  I pleaded, "what should I eat?"  He made no attempt at a decent suggestion.  I often used to ask my mom this question when I was growing up.  Sometimes she would get so frustrated at my rejection in her food ideas that she would eventually explode and scream out, "what do you want from me, HERE (shoving her forearm in my face) take a bite of my arm already!", or something to that effect.  In my opinion, most every meal has to be something I really want to eat; otherwise, what's the point of eating?  I don't want to waste the calories on boring meals.  Anyway, back from that tangent ... all this lead up to my extreme behavior in the corner.

Of course like a good husband, he finally came up with a suggestion I had not thought of.  "Hey we have that polish sausage in the fridge!" Oooo, nice, I was totally excited, "can you fry that up for me?"  And so this was to be my dinner.  I know, WTF, right.  Well, then he made a second suggestion to accompany the sausage, "hey you want a peanut butter sandwich?"  hmmm interesting combo.  I mean totally off the wall; who eats sausage with a peanut butter jelly sandwich?!  Weird, but the sweetness of the jelly and the saltiness of the sausage sounded reasonable.

I scarfed down the deliciousness, but couldn't finish all the sausage, it was so damn greasy.  I went to bed thinking, 'damn that was one greasy polish sausage'.

You know sometimes you have those dreams that meld with reality?  Well I had a dream I kept waking up from my slumber because I was really nauseous.  Well in reality I finally woke up in the middle of the night not feeling so hot.  Ugh, I tried to ignore it and go back to sleep, but that shit was just not happening.  There is only one way to get rid of that feeling; visit my friend Ralph.

The old Russian standby on quick an easy regurgitation involves one simple ingredient ... warm water.  I will spare you the details, but I gulped down my fair share and several yakking sessions later, the yakking ceased and I was finally able to go to bed. Obviously the lack of sleep and bodily dysfunction meant there was no way I was going to work the next day.  I got to relax, let my body recover and of course paint my nails.      

China Glaze - Rich and Famous
1 coat

Klean Color - Pink Holo 134
2 coats

 In the sun and slightly blurry for your viewing pleasure.

Indirect sun.

Wearing these KleanColor Holo's makes me feel like I have acrylic on my nails.  They feel very thick and protected. I'm loving their thick jelly formula.

And so the very next day I woke up and my abs were sore and I eventually remembered it was the yakking session that gave me the impromptu ab workout. Thanks hubby for feeding me bad wiener!


  1. eek! sorry about the food, but love the nails!!

  2. Aww I'm sorry you were sick- but the nails are beautiful! :)

  3. Aww is it bad that this story was hilarious? At least you got a workout!

  4. hahahah... i am so glad i am following your blog LOL.

    and I just ordered my kleancolors and now need them to arrive ASAP!

  5. When I read Polish Sausage I read it as in nail *polish* NP on the brain. Lol! Yes, If I get a mcdonalds sausage biscuit I like to add jelly on it. Yummy!

    Your nails look super pretty :)

  6. Such a pretty combo. MUST HAVE. xP

  7. OMG! Bad weiner! Hate it when that happens-do you have 6 pk abs now?

  8. LOL..."Thanks hubby for feeding me bad wiener!" I nearly inhaled a piece of apple when I got to that part... omg.

  9. I absolutely LOVE you!!! I am Russian myself, was born in Moscow and all. The fact that I can totally relate to this makes me laugh! I STILL ask my mom what to eat, and she tells open the fridge and look inside. Or she really did get frustrated...haha So funny...

  10. Every meal is a production to me, since I want to "make it count" too....If I don't LOVE what I am eating, then I'd rather not eat at all (ha, that won't last very long!), so I feel your pain!
    Ooh, and I also had a dream that melded with reality 2 nights ago...I had a pain in my foot, so I began dreaming that I was being bit by a hobo spider. They were on my brain apparently because we have been finding them in our garage and capturing them in mason jars so we could confirm that they were the nasty, venomous hobo kind....YUCK. Ha! As I type there are 3 mason jars sitting on my counter with nasty ass spiders sitting in them. I like to walk by them and give them a little shake >:)
    Where does one find Klean Color polishes? I have yet to try these and they look fantastic! So pretty on you :)

  11. LMAO!! I find that I'm starving at times too because I'm too lazy to figure out something to eat! And LOL at BP and J sandwich with sausage....did you put the sausage on the sandwich?

    Anyways...gorgeous mani!

  12. lol, what a story! Although I enjoyed reading every bit of it I hope you are feeling better :)

  13. Ahh, poor you! Your nails are hot. ♥

  14. Im gonna try peanut butter sandwich with double cheese sausage tonight! thats actually a good idea! just show them your gorgeous nails and tell them you will ruin the pretty nails if you cook LOL

  15. I laughed SO HARD at this blog post. God, that was funny.

    Make him buy you some nail polish as an apology :L This is a gorgeous colour, and I'm loving the holo glitter. Second picture is where it's at.

  16. HaHaHa, great colors though. really like it!

  17. Note to self: do not read Loodie's blog while riding public transportation.

    I laughed like a madwoman. People gave me strange looks. I laughed some more.
    So sorry about your husband's bad wiener. ;)

    (But your nails look fabulous, as always, дорогая)

  18. Hahahaha, I'm sorry you got sick, but this post cracks me up! :D
    Gorgeous nails as always! Let's get our nails together for a date, lol! ;D

  19. awesome nails sorry about the visit to your toilet friend :)

    shel xx

  20. so my hubs often tells me that if I was a wild animal that had to fend for myself I would die very very quickly. more often than not I can be found in a corner, whimpering and whining that I am hungry. weez r 2 peas in a pod

  21. @Deborah - I left a funny right for the end there as a reward for people that actually read the whole thing ;)

    @Jacki and GretalRabbit - I can't complain too much. I got to lounge all day and do my nails. :)

    @Laura - Not at all. I need it to be somewhat entertaining so that I could work in the mani. LOL, hell considering I haven't actually worked out in months, YAY!!

    @Elizabeth - You'll love them. You'll get high and a great mani :P

    @rmcandlelight (nailsbeautiqued)- HILARIOUS!! hahah. oh now you're making me want to go to Mikky D's, bad bad, but I guess if there is a workout involved ...

    @VijiiS - It's gorgeous and girly!

    @Fingers - LOL, you know it, I'll be in the next AB roller infomercial :P

    @Noelie - OMG lol, I don't want you to die, your nails are too damn pretty, but for the sake of a good laugh, it might be worth it.

    @Eat.Sleep.Polish. - it was the wieners pleasure.

    @Vero - awesome!! oh Russian mothers, they're the best! BTW you have gorgeous eyeballs!

    @Maribeth - Exactly!! Even if I'm starving I will still hold out.

    haha, you taunt the spider! Give them a piece of their own medicine!

    I tried looking for these KC holo in the usually places I see KC , dollar stores or beauty supply stores, because usually they are only $1, but I couldn't find them so I broke down and paid $1.75 each + shipping at beautyjoint. $1 would have been a steal, but 1.75 isn't that bad either.

    @Angie - Darn that would have been a good idea!!! Next time ... which won't be for a long while because I can't stand to look at wieners at the moment.

    @Danielle - Thank you, no worries. The worst is behind me and hey it makes for an interesting way to bring up polish.

    @AmyGrace - :D Thank you! NO, YOUR nails are hot!!

    @Silence is Loud - Truth be told ... I use that line on a daily basis, especially when it comes to dishes. My family rolls their eyes constantly, lol.

    @The Student's Guide To Nail Polish - Thanks Lena!! OOoo nice, use guilt for polish, I like where you're going with this!!

    @Carrie - Thanks Carrie, now go moisturize ;)

    @Sinead - Bahahah, I am sure you looked like a crazy. If your public transportation is anything like what I ride everyday, you fit right in LOL! OMG, Я люблю тебя for using Russian!! :D <3

    @Solveig - Date night! Does that mean we have to coordinate mani's?!

    @Irishenchantment - lol at toilet friend. I hate him, he's a cold bastard.

    @Toyomi - Thank you! :D

    @jbrobeck - LOL. Correction, we are two AWESOME peas in a pod. <3

  22. Sorry to hear you were sick. :( Though thanks for the tip about drinking warm water! I usually just lie on the bathroom floor for hours. Your way sounds much more efficient.

  23. I hope you're feeling better now :)
    Your nails are gorgeous (as usual) and I love this combo! KC holos are amazing.

  24. "Bad Weiner", huh?! Yeah....I'm betting that's what he'd want to hear you say! I feel bad for you, girlfriend....really do! Glad you had a chance at recovering though...and what does my brainiac do with her day off? Why, paint her nails of course! Love the shade & your nails are looking might fine!! Note to self: keep away from funky dogs!!

  25. Didn't you know in your dream it was me sitting on your stomach? I was little Miss Muffet and I thought your stomach was a tuffet, eating curds and whey.

  26. @Theomanic - LOL, you poor thing. Don't torture yourself any longer. Drink it warm and drink it fast. It will be out in no time, without the need to even put objects down the gullet.

    @Miss Blue - Thank you miss blue :D

    @Polish Vixen Marisa - yay! - Ikr, lol! Of course nail painting is therapeutic!

    OMG FUNKAY DOGS! LOL keep them out of your mouth.

    @Olivia - HAHAHA, well I barfed so hard against the porcelain god you must have a headache right now.

  27. Not to laugh at your expense and your pain, but that's kind of a hilarious story LOL! But I can totally understand the link between the story and the nail polish - I've been sick for days and the only thing I wanna do is paint my nails! No matter what, you can always have energy for that :) Best kind of day off!

    Oh yea, and the polish looks great ;P

  28. Hopefully you fine now. Unfortunately I can't view the pictures on your blog. Maybe it's my internet connection or something. I better check your blog again. :D

  29. - it totally is, laugh away! I definitely always have the energy for polishing, its relaxing anyway. Thank you!

    @Spartan ab workout - Please come back! :D I'm not sure why you can't view the pic's either :-/ Let me know if it's a problem again!